“It was a million-to-one shot, Doc.”
“My hands were full.”
These and many other ludicrous excuses are what emergency room doctors hear every day from patients who check in with various items inserted where the sun don’t shine, stuck in various orifices, or ingested in other ways.
How exactly did that cell phone end up there? Was it on vibrate? And is the rectum truly the best place to store your bronzed baby shoes? It is at least somewhat understandable to find a rectal thermometer in its intended place, but how about your six-year-old daughter’s Barbie doll?
Start browsing this hilarious collection of images – you’ll be surprised at the patients’ creativity and the medical information provided. And: Don’t try this at home.…
Rich Dreben, M.D., is a board-certified psychiatrist who has treated patients in multiple outpatient settings, the psychiatric emergency room, and jail psychiatry clinics. Dr. Dreben currently practices psychiatry in California.
Murdoc Knight, M.D., is a board-certified emergency physician attending, working at multiple hospitals in Massachusetts. He holds degrees in biomedical engineering and medicine from the University of California.
Marty A. Sindhian, M.D., is a board-certified adult psychiatrist who specializes in psychosomatic medicine and forensic psychiatry. He works and teaches in a hospital in California, while also having a small private practice.
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