BABIES. Maybe youíre thinking of having one. There might even be one inside you right now, draining nutrients from your system via a tube growing from its midsection. Or maybe youíve already got one around the house, somewhe......more
BABIES. Maybe youíre thinking of having one. There might even be one inside you right now, draining nutrients from your system via a tube growing from its midsection. Or maybe youíve already got one around the house, somewhere, and youíre responsible for its continued survival. Youíre saddled with a helpless being whom youíve agreed to house and feed and love with all your heart for the rest of your life, more or less.
Either way, youíre confused, youíre frightened, and 911 wonít take your calls anymore. But donít despair! Letís Panic About Babies! is here to hold your hand and answer some important, age-old baby-related questions, including:
- How can I be sure Iím pregnant? (Torso swells gradually until baby falls into underpants.)
- Did I just pee myself? (Yes.)
- What happens if I have sex during my pregnancy? (Your baby will be born with a full, lush beard.)
- How can I tell if Iíve chosen the wrong pediatrician? (He/she canít pronounce ďstethoscope.Ē)
- How do I make sure my baby loves me back? (Voodoo.)
From the moment theyíre created until the day they steal our cars, our babies demand center stage in our lives. So join Alice and Eden as they tell you (and your lucky partner!) exactly what to think and feel and do, from morning sickness to babyís first steps. They know everything!
This item will be delivered to you via USPS Trackable Media Mail or UPS Mail Innovations and will take from 2 days to 3 weeks from the time the item leaves our warehouse. *
Items must be returned in new or unused condition and contain all original materials included with the shipment. More details
FINAL SALE EXCLUSION: Items marked as FINAL SALE are not returnable unless the problem you experience is the result of our error.
* For your safety, some orders go through our loss prevention department. If we select your order for this process, we will immediately notify you that there may be up to a 3-day delay on your order.
** Most Oversize orders are delivered within 1-4 weeks. Some orders may take 6 weeks to be delivered.